The Reality of Being a “Double-Decker” Sandwich Caregiver
I recently came across an article that introduced the term Sandwich Caregiver—someone balancing the responsibility of caring for both their children (usually under 18) and their aging parents. It resonated deeply but also made me wonder: What about those of us caring for an even broader range of generations?
My spouse and I are full-time caregivers for my grandparents while navigating our own responsibilities and relationships. Does that make us Double-Decker Sandwich Caregivers—caught between three worlds instead of two? It often feels that way as we transition between learning the ways of a younger generation and relating to an older one, all while feeling stuck somewhere in the middle.
According to the article, we’re not alone. More than 5 million people are classified as Sandwich Caregivers, juggling the demands of multiple generations. And if there’s one truth I’ve learned, it’s that caregiving will make you reflect—on yourself, your patience, your limits, and even your behaviors. Stress and challenges come with the role, as do moments of deep connection and unexpected blessings.
One of the biggest lessons I’ve embraced is giving myself permission—permission to not feel guilty for needing space, permission to acknowledge my emotions—both the overwhelming and the uplifting ones. This life was a choice, and while it isn’t always easy, it has also revealed a strength within us that we never knew we had.
So, instead of dwelling on the weight of responsibility, we focus on creating new memories. Because, in the end, caregiving isn’t just about what we give—it’s about the love, resilience, and joy we build along the way.
Erica D. Jones, PhD (Double-Decker Sandwich Caregiver)
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